"Weird Pictures" (Title by Josh)

Note: This post was accidentally published yesterday before it was finished. Sorry if you've already seen most of it and were completely disappointed with my editing skills!

JOSH

4.1 years old

Josh says funny things. He makes me LOL and ROTFL every day.

He was making squids (yes, squids) out of Legos one day and told me that he built a boy squid and a daddy squid. I thought this was sweet, and very creative. Then he told me that the mommy and the baby squids died. Apparently somebody shot them. Hmm, maybe I should let him play more video games...?

While silently watching me work on the computer, he saw me "cut" a paragraph of text, and before I could find the place I wanted to paste it, he said "Push V now." What?? (In case you don't know, Mom, Ctrl + V is the shortcut to paste text.) How in the world did he know what I was doing? And how did he know about keyboard shortcuts? He watches every detail of what I do, and I'm starting to feel the pressure!

Taking a rest on the walk into Dow Gardens, making Jude laugh

I got a bunch of pregnancy test strips in the mail (because I'm neurotic and think I'm pregnant all the time). Josh saw me open them and asked what they were. I figured I might as well tell him the truth. Later, after putting it together in his head, he came to me and explained, "Mom, when your tummy's really big and you have to go potty, you say 'Let's take a test!'" That's absolutely right, Josh. He's mentioned it a couple more times since then. Now I just hope he doesn't associate the word "test" with pregnant pee for the rest of his life.

Later, still thinking about it, "If you have a baby in your tummy and you put clothes on, it will just POP!...The shirt or the dress will pop, not the tummy."

First time watching Star Wars

He brought a paper airplane home from a babysitter one day and it got smushed in the car. When I fixed it, his eyes got all big and he said, "YOU know how to fold paper airplanes??!" He said this with excited surprise, and maybe a little reproach, as if it was the best skill ever and I was a terrible person for keeping it a secret from him. CoolMom points earned for the day.

I handed Josh a pad of Post-it notes and told him to write a little note to my brother so I could send it with a package. I guess he interpreted my instructions in a different way, because he handed back to me a bunch of music notes he had written. Then he told me to label them with their correct names, like half note and quarter note. Maybe he already understands that music has its own way of communicating! Either that or he's a smart alec....

He was watching a carpentry show on PBS while he was waiting for me to turn on a movie for him. When I tried to, he calmly said "Mom stop, I'm trying to watch this guy build a boat." He will watch anything on TV. Matt: "I don't think it's a boat, buddy." Josh: "Maybe a person?"

"What does this say?" pointing to a heart on the Honey Nut Cheerios box. "Helps Lower Cholesterol" I tell him. "Ohhhh. I wanted it to get rid of the cholesterol!"

JUDE

17 months old

Jude continues to test me. At all times, I find myself either wanting to smother him with smooches, or punt him out the window. There's not much in between. Lukewarm is not my temperature these days.

He emptied four different spice containers onto the floor this week. He's way too good at unscrewing lids. He did the same thing with my make up, mascara, toothpaste, travel shampoo bottles, two cereal boxes, and a big container of buttons this week, as well. Darn your manual dexterity, Jude!

After a scolding, he walked himself to time out. He tried to stick his nose all the way into the corner and was frustrated when it wouldn't touch. What do you do when your child actually likes time out?

Jude has always been a pain to take to the playground. I've had to follow his every step because he is too ambitious for his wobbly little legs. He only wants to go down the highest, longest slide on the playground, and won't go near the little baby ones. He wants to climb all the stairs to the highest point, and then slide down by himself, usually on his stomach. We're finally at the point where my little daredevil can manage alone without falling to his death, but I still have heart palpitations every time.

Speaking of climbing, Jude climbs onto every table he can find. Lately he tries to climb on top of the piano too, which makes me wish I could swear in different languages. He loves to move step stools so he can reach light switches and play with those all day. He rocks back and forth in his high chair so violently that it almost tips over. He has regular tantrums because I am constantly thwarting his will to destroy.

Skyping with grandparents

Stopping to check out the fish at Meijer. Don't let that innocent look fool you.
He's really thinking of what he can use to break that glass!

On the cute side, he's a pretty good little dancer. He shakes his head around and bounces his legs every time he hears music. He tries to sing too, which I need to get on video.

He tries to say everything I say. His baby talk vocab is growing every day and he gets so excited when I understand him.

He copies everything Josh does, even if it's swinging underwear around like a nun-chuck so they can fight.

He thinks he's really funny when he puts underwear on his head. I think it's funny too, but I've been forbidden to post pictures of such nonsense because his father thinks Jude will be embarrassed someday. Of a hot pink underwear hat? I don't get it.

I love my job.

(P.S. Most of these pictures were taken about a month ago.)